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  • November 2, 2015

From: OldBat Back2life Date: Sun, Oct 18, 2015 at 3:58 AM Subject: Way To Bring Nearly ANY Dead Battery Back To Life again.. Hi There, I’m not sure if you saw my last email but time is running out on this… There’s a new way to bring nearly any type of old battery back to life …so...

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  • November 2, 2015

Subject: How to protect your plush toy Date: 10/29/2015 08:27 PM From: [email protected] Dear friends, This is Dancy from a manufacturer specializing in producing Plush toys in China. We have been in this industry for over 18 years. Our advantages: 1.Experience:have 18 years experience in plush toys industry. 2.Custom Products:Our art team will make you layout perfect, and help you get the products you envision . 3.Delivery time:30-45 days normally. 4.Quality Material:The best materials make the best plush and we don’t skimp on sourcing the best material. 5.Certificate :All the products are withLi&Fung factory audit,Disney audit ,ISO certificate …. Dearest Dancy, I received your correspondence at a most opportune time — perhaps providence has smiled upon us both. You see, I have envisioned a new line of plush toys based on animal genitalia. The first model...

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  • September 23, 2015

          

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  • August 31, 2015

the kik bots seem to have a hat fetish – or they’re just convinced that all humans wear them. have they been watching too many noir films from the 40s & 50s or a bunch of westerns?! [most of my lines are from High Plains Drifter]  

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  • August 12, 2015

I wish I’d thought of putting a Prince bot on Tinder — it’s pure mad genius!  

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  • August 10, 2015

Dear Madam or Sir, I have received your encrypted message but have unfortunately not yet received the key with which to unlock it. In the mean time, I hope you enjoy these random haiku… Like any poet, I leave it to the reader to decide if there is any hidden meaning. fearless chimera uncovers, fiery hawks chortle...

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  • June 1, 2015

From: ED <[email protected]> Date: June 1, 2015 at 1:54:26 AM PDT Subject: quotation to rubber pet toys Dear Purchasing Manager Good day, this is Ed. I am writing to you to introduce my company Yangzhou Zhongmao Pet Products Co.,LTD. We are manufacturers/suppliers of RUBBER PET TOYS. I have attached quotation of our best selling products...

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  • May 8, 2015

From: “Tom Hanks” <[email protected]> Subject: What Chabot College did for me: Date: Fri, 08 May 2015 09:52:17 -0600 Chabot College is a rambling series of academic buildings situated on 94 acres in Hayward, California. It offers more than 100 associate degrees and certificates, an intercollegiate national championship-winning ultimate disc team, and parking for a couple...

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  • April 23, 2015

From: Margaret Hernandez <[email protected]> Date: April 18, 2015 at 2:49:07 PM GMT-7 Subject: It was a very arduous week and er..truely didn’t get the chance to email you… Hey there again, Could you just let me know if you received the shipment?? By the way – below I watched the wrestling hotrod I was telling...